merissa

When routine bites hard
and ambitions are low
And resentment rides high
but emotions won't grow
And we're changing our ways,
taking different roads
Then love, love will tear us apart
again [x4]

Why is this bedroom so cold
Turned away on your side?
Is my timing that flawed,
our respect run so dry?
Yet there's still this appeal
That we've kept through our lives
And love, love will tear us apart again [x4]

Do you cry out in your sleep
All my feelings expose?
Get a taste in my mouth
As desperation takes hold
Is it something so good
Just can't function no more?
When love, love will tear us apart again [x7] 

i'm sorry you won't miss me...because i'm sure as hell going to miss you. it's a shame things couldn't be different.

but you taught me best.....no regrets.

omfg.......he is legend is going to be at the indianapolis warped.

there's NO way i'm missing them again.

as if this year's lineup wasn't badass enough.

seriously. you have NO clue. I get to see them two months in a row. TWO.

now all i need is head automatica to come to chicago/surrounding area sometime before the end of the year and my list of bands to see within my first 12 months in the city is complete.

p.s.
this time tomorrow, i'll be safe and sound in the homeland.

so i just had a really good night.

megan, jorge, em, martin and i...little bar...lots of pbr...pool.

i walked a mile and such home. because i missed the last brown line train. *middle finger to the cta*

oh and that one guy that i'm occasionally talking about on my floor. smoked a square with him. good times. he's fun, that nick. we both played pool tonight.

fuck...it's almost four. why am i not in bed?

p.s.
i'm not drunk. it may seem like it because i've been up for almost a day and a half....but i'm not.

I've been so down lately.
You've been so low lately.
Nothing seems to work out for you and me.
For you and me.
-----------------------------------------

+ got my books today.
- bar going with jorge is rescheduled.
++ hanging out with rachel at some point tonight.
+ washed my fuzzy blanket. now it smells good as well as being awesome.
- missing class thursday of this coming week. and tuesday of next.
++++ going home thursday.
++ i made a chicken quesadilla from scratch.
- i now have two nights to get my sleeping schedule back into shape for school.
++ might be getting an apartment out of student housing next quarter.
++++ Columbia essay is now 3/4 done.
++++ Possible Alkaline Trio on the 30th if I can find people that want to go/can house me.
++++ A little over a month until Thursday.
---- A little over a month until Thursday is a little over a month too long.
++++ Coheed and A7X the day before Thursday.
- The ammount of pain I'm going to be in that Friday
+/- Rambling and making lists at 1:09 because I don't have anything to do.

You're the echoes of my everything,
You're the emptiness the whole world sings at night.
You're the laziness of afternoon,
You're the reason why I burst and why I bloomed..
You're the leaky sink of sentiment,
You're the failed attempts I never could forget.
You're the metaphors I can't create to comprehend this curse that I call love..
- Motion City Soundtrack. hold me down.

i've slept most of today. now i'm going to be up all night. work tomorrow. hanging out with lillian on thursday. work friday and saturday. off sunday...probably go job hunting. class starts again tuesday. thank god. no, seriously. i need a distraction. oh and then i'm home for a week starting (more than likely) thursday. YAY! rest, relaxation, time to think, room to breathe, people that keep me sane. oh but i'll have homework with me. because i'm dumb and i'll be missing both thursday AND the next tuesday. at least i can do my homework in peace...

so tony finally got all of his stuff out of his apartment. it's gonna be so weird to not have him around all the time. we had some fun last night though. so much fun i was still feeling it when i woke up this morning. then i found out that my roommate, jacey, is moving out this quarter. she and i got along the best out of everyone and now she'll be gone. i just hope the girl that takes her place doesn't suck. and to make everything else more awesome.....i have to work at 4. until 10:30 tonight. YAY. big fun.

and to top it off, my phone won't be back on until a week from today because i STILL haven't gotten that doccument from the school....so no possible phone call from daryl palumbo (katie's awesome to have tried for me though.) to brighten my mood.

i did however, have the best bowl of ramen i've had in a while.

Wow, the last few days have been really great. Good friends, good times, and good music. I'd go into detail but somehow I think think that would dull the stories just a bit. You know, it's really funny how seeing a person changes your mood completely. Oh yeah and on an unrelated note Travis Miguel is one of the nicest guys I have ever met. Too bad he couldn't come to dinner with us.

I'll end this update with a dedication of sorts to something or someone i may or may not be thinking about:

Soon ends our stay here and it's been fun.
So tonight I'll raise my glass to us.
'Cause we've talked so much I think we filled this ashtray twice,
And I'm pretty sure we emptied every bottle in the place...

So let's walk home, let's be afraid.
I wanna grab you by the arms and kiss you so hard.
Let's do it right, under the streetlight.
I want it now, somehow I forgot how.

Way to go, way to go.
Forgot you've got so far to go.
Way to go, way to go.
Forgot you've got so far to go.

I heard everybody's voice cut out when you spoke.
And I watched all the lights go dim when your eyes opened.
Well I can't believe you showed up,
What do I do now?
It's last call, time to go.
But before we say goodnight...

Let's walk home, let's be afraid.
I wanna grab you by the arms and kiss you so hard.
Let's do it right under the streetlight.
I want it now, somehow I forgot how.

Way to go, way to go.
Forgot you've got so far to go.
Way to go, way to go.
Forgot you've got so far to go.
Forgot you've got so far, you've got so far to go.
Forgot you've got so far, you've got so far to go.
Forgot you've got so far, you've got so far to go.
Forgot you've got so far, you've got so far to go.

I put it all on black, no color you're all dressed in
And a stab in the back left you bleeding on the floor
And I'm mourning the death, the recent passing of your insides
I smile in regret every time I think of how I spoke to you

I put it all in back of my mind where I hold you
I'm just trying to keep track how far back it really goes
And I'm living in lack of the blood sent from the heavens
I'm just trying to relax as the killer's waiting right outside my door

What's black and white?
What's read all over?
This tired book, this organ donor

Sweet blasphemy, my giving tree
It hasn't rained in years
I bring to you this sacrificial offering of virgin ears
Leave it to me, I remain free from all the comforts of home
And where that is, I'm pleased as piss to say, I'll never really know

I put them all in black, the four walls of my bedroom
And I trimmed them in red, peeled your picture off the wall
And I'm living in lack of the blood sent from your heartbeat
That arrived in your neck every time I salivated over you

What's upside down?
What's coated in silver?
This crucifix is my four leaf clover

Sweet blasphemy, my giving tree
It hasn't rained in years
I bring to you this sacrificial offering of virgin ears
Leave it to me, I remain free from all the comforts of home
And where that is, I'm pleased as piss to say, I'll never really know

One of these days, it's gonna catch up to you
Throwing looks like those around
One of these nights, I promise to you
I'll soon be sleeping sound
As soon as I leave town